Saturday was all about Funke & Abi's wedding and yeah it was the last day of the Lagos Fashion & Design Week, Ooo ok!
So here's how my day started, decided I'm going to get my nails done, I'm not looking forward to it cause I'm expecting for it to be crowded and dare I say noisy.
PART 1 ~ The Nails
So I made a point to get there as early as possible. I'm going in for a dissolve, wrap and a pedicure (boys if you don't know what those are, ask a girlfriend or your sister). Before I sit to start the dissolve I check the magazine rack as you do, to discover a fresh copy of Tatler, love Tatler but don't get to read them as often as I'd like. So I immediately pounce on it.
As I'm getting a dissolve its more about holding on to it till when I can read it, and I put it next to me as I sit. I notice the lady next to me also getting a dissolve eye the magazine and in my mind I'm thinking, my friend you best move your eyes away before I drop kick you to the door ( a tad bit violent you're thinking I'm sure, but not when my worst fears were realized). So I go about my dissolve and of course the woman having been theRe before me finishes before me, and gets up and swipes the magazine I was saving. As if I had envisioned the whole act, I began to seethe, not one to cause a scene I watched her and she proceeded to begin her manicure. My face when I'm mad, not pretty ~ in fact if looks could kill I would be the Spanish Armada! then she goes to choose her polish of choice and I purposefully ask the technician working on her nails whether there is another copy of the Tatler as said woman had swiped mine. She said there wasn't and promptly got up to go and meet the woman to 'help' her pick out her nail polish, and of course promptly told her what I had said. Anyways it would suffice to say that there were a few daggers thrown at one another and a comment made by said woman, and I quote 'she should swallow me if she wants to' said in Yoruba as the usual assumption is that I can't speak or understand my language. After a while she asked the girl to hand it over to me, I declined as I had already pulled out my ipad and was already reading another magazine online.
So that's that, and then the owner of the store arrives and of course with the usual Nigerian fanfare, she walks in with all the bru haha she could muster to announce her arrival. And proceeds to sit with at least 5 other women. Then ensues the debate (at the very loudest noise level) about which BlackBerry is the best, the curves are the absolute best, the Bolds aren't very good, the battery of the new bold is rubbish, ones husband spent $1600 buying hers and its just so irritating, the battery life is. And as they're cackling away, a voice cuts through the din to say, I want you to paint it red, I want to shout today!
Let's get back to the cacophony, so one says 'hmm I'm sitting with the Fowlers, and so many people will be giving the couple money and just so that her father can see them when they're doing it', the other says 'I don't know if I'm going (the same one who just asked for her nails to be painted red) but if I don't go 'she' will be very upset' to which the owner says,' what do you mean she'll be upset, aren't you the one that's been begging her to take you with her?' To which Red nail lady replies, 'Go jor, ha haha' ~ I really wanted to dig that hole for her so she could enter it. Poor thing. Right at that moment though on the other side of the room, another woman picks up the phone and says 'My dear, I still haven't received the gele you said you sent to me, oh ok you will bring it when you come to pick me up for the wedding, ok my dear see you later'that conversation was then followed by a very long and harsh mcccssshhheeeewww from the first group of ladies. At which point they all continue about their business of getting their nails done.
#Hungralite type A ~ the ones who want to be noticed, and just pretty much latch themselves on to anything or anyone that's of 'the moment' these women are all married and in their late 30's to mid 40's.
PART 2 ~ Getting Ready
My nails get done I go home, now starts the process of getting ready. I attempt to do a pre run of the gele tying, asking the housekeeper to help me, it entailed a lot of shouting for me, e fa, e tu fa (pull it, pull it again) and then ending up looking like a scare crow, let's just say it didn't work out. When I was dressed though and my darling of a boyfriend very succinctly told me to hurry it up, I was sulking cause I wanted to wear my gele. My second attempt which he had witnessed the beginning of ended up being futile and when he came to tell me to hurry up, he noticed that i didn't have it on, asked me why and told me it had looked nice. Told him of the debacle that I had contrived and he advised I ask the housekeeper for help at which period I told him about the mishap that had ensued earlier on. But I thought it sweet that he had noticed and promptly asked him to please give me a few more minutes to put myself together, and I at that period of time decided to give it one last try. I did and it. Came out funky, fresh and quite traditional.
And of we go... We get to just before City Mall and its chokablok traffic. And then guess what happens, some twerp decides I'm going to use the screaming siren of his automobile, to try to move past everyone. Let's just say that there was a vibe in the traffic that said 'Yeah ¯\..(•͡._ •͡ )../¯, you can stay right where you are in traffic with everyone else °\_°\_(-__-) . No one was having any of it. The siren went off after a while and traffic proceeded in time.
And then we get into the venue, beautifully decorated and OMG, it really was the Society wedding it promised to be.
So I walk in with my boyfriend and his cousins we had seen as we were walking in, and another friend of mine. J.
PART 3 ~ Let the Posing Begin
So you know how you walk into a venue see people and stop to chat and say hi, that what everyone was doing, so imagine my shock when we get to the 'young corner' and I see this woman that I'd had a meeting just the day before, we made eye contact for a split second and she then proceeds to pretend not to have seen me. You know what I did, being that I was so thrown back by her behaviour, I stopped and stood directly in front of her and proceeded to shout her name, she still ignored until her friend tapped her on the shoulder and then she did the whole oh dear hi how are you? =))º°˚˚˚°ºнaĦaнaº°˚˚˚°º=)) what hilarity.
#Hungralite type B ~ doesn't know who to pose for just an errant need to be part of something. Hence the reason why she was sitting with two people and looking around the room looking for some form of attention, and posing for me, maybe she thought I was coming to meet her to ask to sit with her. Now that would have been funny, no actually it would have been quite sad!
After that saw a few more friends and saw U and his wife N, who just had a baby and looked stunning, she's an absolute doll, stunning and smart and OMG just having had her 2nd baby, you wouldn't even know it. Sat at the table with her and across the table from us sat the sad married ones. There's definitely no harm in being married in fact its what all women want and all little girls dream of their wedding day. But then there are the sad married ones they are in a whole category of their own. They are married and they believe they're somehow better than everybody else. One of these married girls (they're between 25 ~ 29) I actually saw last week when I went to Likwid and she was all very ooh come, have a drink with me, your hairs gorgeous, when I had my short hair (just last weekend). And yesterday she sat there, and pretended not to know me. SMH, I was taken aback at first but then this is what you get, the yearning and desire to be a part of something so bad you lose yourself.
#Hungralite Type C ~ the married, hungry socialite that's too dense to think for herself. Lol
Apart from that it was a fabulous event. I had soo much fun, saw J & I, both I haven't seen in ages, normal married women (might be an age thing) who respect themselves and have no need to be affected by the fabulousity they are surrounded with. I guess, one has to know in order to be able to survive it. The #Hungralites shall grow, they might graduate to become socialites, but its a lost cause for the few I saw yesterday. Alas its not for everyone.
Oh and I'm not even going to mention the Queen #Hungralite of them all, who was feeling cool, (by telling me that she was at the wedding) and after I told her I was there too, refused to tell me where she was sitting. The affected people that we have in this town amuses me. But more on the affectations later ; )
But most importantly, the Engagement was stunning with the Most beautiful couple and most suited couple I've seen in a while, friends and family all looked all so sophisticated and well generally very very happy.
Anyway, I think that's about enough from me, don't you? ; )
Ciao ciao my lovelies, chat soon XXX
Misi Molu ~ Pink Pepper Productions, making your party that much hotter!!!
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